Where To Start When Planning a Wedding: 13 Steps To Creating the Celebration of Your Dreams
Planning a wedding is one of the most exciting milestones in your life as a couple, but it can also feel like one of the most overwhelming. It’s completely normal to experience a mix of joy, anticipation, and stress as you start planning your special day together.
The good news is that there are clear steps you can follow to keep the focus on celebrating your love rather than getting lost in the stress of organizing your wedding.
In this guide, we’ll walk through some practical tips to help you organize your vision, choose the right priorities, and enjoy the process. This list offers a strong foundation to make your wedding planning feel more intentional, less stressful, and full of the excitement it deserves.
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What Should You Do First When Planning a Wedding?
While it’s tempting to dive straight into all the details of your dream wedding, two decisions rise above the rest:
Establishing your budget: Your budget acts as the framework for your entire celebration, shaping the scale of your guest list, the style of your menu, and every little detail that will make your wedding special. Once you have clarity on what your budget is, you’ll be ready to contact the venue and vendors, and make confident decisions that feel exciting rather than overwhelming.
Finding the right venue: Selecting a venue early ensures your preferred date is secured and gives you a strong foundation as you begin to build the rest of your wedding vision. The space you choose influences every detail and the atmosphere your guests will remember long after the last dance.
10 Steps To Keep You on Track When You Start Planning a Wedding
#1: Set Your Budget
Your budget should include the setting, food and beverage, photography, florals, desserts, music, rentals, and service. Decide your comfort range. Identify a realistic “target” number and a modest contingency for upgrades you’ll be glad you made — like additional lounge seating or late-night snacks.
Ask what’s truly included. Comparing venues is simpler when you know whether vendor services are already built into pricing.
At Twenty Mile House, couples love our full-service packages that include catering, photography, bakery, floral, and DJ, eliminating guesswork and multiple contracts. If you have a meaningful reason to bring a specific vendor, we make thoughtful exceptions while preserving a seamless experience.
#2: Reserve the Perfect Venue
Your venue is the heart of your wedding. When choosing one, consider more than just the backdrop for your photos. Think about the flow of the day, guest accommodations, vendor requirements, and how the space supports the type of celebration you’re imagining. A well-chosen venue makes planning easier, ensuring every detail fits seamlessly into place.
At Twenty Mile House, we’ve designed our eco-estate wedding venue in the Sierra Nevada mountains to be a complete experience — not just a location. Couples love that our full-service packages unfold with elegance and ease, free of the stress of juggling multiple contracts or coordinating unfamiliar teams.
Beyond the details, our venue offers a feeling that’s hard to find anywhere else: forested ceremony sites, riverside meadows, and historic estate grounds that create a sense of timeless romance. With no noise ordinances, your celebration can continue into the evening without interruption, and on-site accommodations for up to 54 guests make it easy for your closest friends and family to linger for the entire wedding weekend.
#3: Select Your Style & Theme
Deciding your wedding’s theme and style early gives you a clear direction, making it easier to choose details like décor, attire, music, and even the program for the big day. Look for inspiration that feels authentic to you, like images you’ve saved, a magazine spread you can’t stop flipping back to, or even the natural settings you love most. As you gather ideas, pay attention to what stands out and feels like it represents you and your loved one’s creativity and love.
#4: Choose Your Wedding Party
Your wedding party is more than a lineup of familiar faces — it’s a group of people who will walk alongside you during one of the most meaningful seasons of your life. Choosing who to include is both exciting and deeply personal, as these are the friends and family who will support you through planning, celebrate with you on the day itself, and stand beside you in the moments you’ll remember forever.
#5: Decide on Your Vendors
Vendors are the team that turns your wedding vision into reality. Choosing the right professionals — and making sure they can work well together — is one of the most important steps in wedding planning.
For many couples, this step requires countless hours of research, interviews, and comparing contracts. But when you choose Twenty Mile House, you can skip the stress: our full-service packages already include catering, floral, photography, desserts, and DJ services — all provided by trusted local professionals who know our property inside and out. Not only does this save you time, but it also guarantees a cohesive event, since our vendor team works together seamlessly week after week.
Popular add-ons to consider:
Makeup artist and hairstylist
Transportation for guests
Photo booth or guestbook station
Specialty entertainment (live painter, string quartet, cigar or dessert bar)
#6: Shop for Clothing
Your wedding attire is one of the most personal statements you’ll make on your big day. Whether you envision a timeless gown, a tailored suit, or something entirely unique, your clothing should reflect your style, complement your theme, and most importantly — make you feel confident and comfortable.
The key is to start early. Many designers and boutiques require several months for orders, and alterations almost always take more time than expected.
#7: Finalize the Guest List
Your guest list shapes almost every element of your wedding — the size of your venue space, your catering needs, and even the pace of your celebration. Start by creating a “must-have” list of those closest to you, followed by a “would-love-to-have” list for extended family, friends, and colleagues.
Be realistic about your numbers and remember: your wedding should feel intimate and meaningful, not overwhelming. Have an open conversation with your partner (and any family members contributing to the event) about priorities, so everyone is aligned before save-the-dates go out.
#8: Send Save-the-Dates
Once your guest list is finalized and your venue is secured, it’s time to share the exciting news with your loved ones by sending out save-the-dates. These early announcements give guests plenty of time to mark their calendars, arrange travel, and plan around your special day. Include your names, the date, the location, and a note that a formal invitation will follow.
For local weddings, send save-the-dates about four to six months before the event.
For destination weddings or weekend-long celebrations, aim for eight to twelve months ahead.
#9: Plan Your Rehearsal Dinner
The rehearsal dinner is the first true celebration of your wedding weekend. This intimate gathering allows you to slow down, connect with your closest family and friends, and set the mood for celebration.
Some couples prefer a cozy dinner with immediate family and the wedding party, while others turn it into a larger welcome event to greet out-of-town guests. Either way, the rehearsal dinner should feel personal and relaxed, a chance to enjoy good food and meaningful conversation before the excitement of the big day.
#10: Consider Hiring a Day-of Coordinator
A day-of coordinator ensures that all the moving parts come together smoothly, so you can focus on being present and soaking in every moment.
A coordinator’s role is to manage the details you’ve already planned because no couple should have to juggle logistics on their wedding day. Think of them as your behind-the-scenes guide, making sure the day flows effortlessly without requiring your attention.
At Twenty Mile House, many couples find they don’t need to outsource this role, because our experienced in-house team and trusted partner vendors already work together seamlessly. However, if you’d still feel more comfortable having a coordinator, we are more than happy to welcome them as well.
Commonly Asked Questions About Where To Start When Planning a Wedding
Where Do You Start When Planning a Destination Wedding?
The first step in planning a destination wedding is deciding on the location. Your destination sets the stage for everything else — from the type of accommodations your guests will need to the overall atmosphere of your celebration.
Twenty Mile House offers an effortless destination-wedding experience in the heart of the Sierra Nevada mountains, just 60–90 minutes from Lake Tahoe. As an eco-estate wedding venue, we combine natural beauty with thoughtful conveniences, making the planning process smoother for couples and guests alike.
Here’s why couples love choosing Twenty Mile House as their destination wedding venue:
On-site accommodations for up to 54 guests, making it easy to plan a destination wedding without worrying about lodging.
Full-service packages that include catering, floral, desserts, DJ, and photography, eliminating the stress of sourcing and coordinating unfamiliar vendors from afar.
A mountain-meadow and riverside setting that offers the best of Northern California’s natural beauty and activities without requiring long-distance travel for West Coast guests.
How Far in Advance Should You Start When Planning a Wedding?
Most couples begin planning at least one year in advance, giving themselves time to secure their dream venue, lock in key vendors, and map out the details without feeling rushed.
What Should You Never Save Until the Last Minute When Planning a Wedding?
The one decision you don’t want to postpone is securing your venue. Your venue shapes almost every other detail — the guest list, the style of your celebration, and even which vendors you’ll need to book. Because of this, the best venues often book out well over a year in advance, especially for popular months and weekends. Waiting too long can mean compromising on your date, location, or the overall experience you envisioned.
Choosing TMH early comes with peace of mind. Not only do you secure your dream setting, you’ll have a team, a setting, and a streamlined plan for creating an unforgettable celebration.
Take the Stress Out Of Planning With a Destination Wedding at Twenty Mile House
At Twenty Mile House, couples don’t have to juggle dozens of moving parts on their own. Our full-service packages include catering, floral, photography, desserts, and music—so much of the planning is already done the moment you book. Even if you haven’t been planning for 18 months, you’re not behind. We regularly work with couples on tighter timelines, streamlining decisions and creating seamless celebrations in less time than most expect.
Most importantly, we believe there’s nothing unfixable. Whatever challenges or worries come up along the way, our team is here to handle them with calm expertise, so you can focus on enjoying the process and looking forward to your wedding weekend.